It's almost the end of the summer...and what awesome adventures have we gone on? None. Why? Well I can't get ANYTHING done. Nothing. EVER. Half way into any chore I get sidetracked by kid A fighting kid B or kid C taking kid A's toys. Then I give up and we don't get to go have fun. And this happens every. single. day.
Ugh. I'm in such a rut and today started off worse than normal. Usually I wake up earlier than everyone because I need time to wake up or I'm a monster, and it's the only time I'm awake alone. And I can maybe get 1 of my 7 loads of needed laundry done. But today I fell back to sleep because my alarm went off in the middle of a dream (don't you hate that?). When I woke up I was completely bombarded by my older two. My oldest is 10 and has ADHD and he won't ever be quiet. It's "quack quack screeeeeeeeech mommy mommy mommy mommmy guess what guess what I can [blah blah blah] AHHHHH quack reeee eeeeeeeeee!" How anyone could handle that the instant they wake up is beyond me, and I'm a terrible example of a patient and tolerant person. My 6 year old daughter LOVES to tattle and loves to scream at the top of her lungs if her older brother makes her mad. All the parenting books in the world haven't solved that one yet. It's only 9:30 and I'm already ready to throw in the towel and give up for the day. 1 isn't even awake yet!
To top it off, it's raining. Which normally isn't so bad- we play in the rain often. But there's some pouring involved. I can't coordinate rainy-day activities because I can't even find a place to coordinate them. Nowhere is safe from the mess of kids. With the age ranges of 1-10 we have play spaces in every nook and cranny (of which there aren't many- my house is a rectangle with no closets to hide clutter on the first floor- the living spaces) so there are toys and things everywhere.
My house is a mess (and when people say their house is a mess and there's like 2 things on their counters, maybe a blanket askew, a throw pillow fell on the floor and they might need to run the vacuum over the carpet once I hate them- I want to say "come see my house and tell me that your house is a "wreck"). My house is a real, live, serious mess and I can't even clean it because I'm playing ref to my team constantly. I can only sit here and wonder when I'll ever be able to clean it. And organized...well that might never happen. And boy oh boy would I just love it if my kids would clean up after themselves once, without me having to hunt them down and force them to do it. So I'm constantly at war with my kids and house and always losing the fight.
I know some of this is my fault. I know there are things I could do and steps I could take to prevent these things from happening as often as they do. It doesn't help I have some sort of issue with being tired all the time. And not "mom tired". I am purely exhausted throughout the day, regardless of what I eat or what I'm doing. At around 6 I hit a wall and almost completely crash. It takes everything in my power to keep myself going for the next 4-5 hours. Being this tired does nothing for my stress levels and ability to handle craziness AND being the head of house. Where's hubby? He's at work from about 8:30-9pm so I'm going it alone most of the time. If you read my blog regularly you know that he is on a quest to lose some weight. He stays after work to workout at the office building's gym. One day he's going to have to quit and start somewhere that we can all go so that I can get these kids out of the house and give myself some peace.
I just need to vent. To hear that others might be going through something similar (stories please). Some SOLUTIONS!